Dear you, I’m not sure whether you exist or what. And I’m not being rude but no one...

Sun, 12 May 2013 20:35:25 -0400

Dear you,
I’m not sure whether you exist or what. And I’m not being rude but no one knows for sure do they. But if you so, hey! I’m Isla, and I need your help to help me to help myself if that makes any sense.
You’re sadly going to be burdened with my life problems and my crazy thoughts. I’m sorry you have this job :( but hey! Everyone needs their chance of escape. X
You shouldn’t feel guilty, you wanted it and it’s in the past and you can’t make it go away, you’ll have to live with it. And I will, but I want it to be special between me and Ollie, I want him to believe it’s my first time. I know it’s not and it’s wrong, but I want myself to believe it’s my first time as well. Then I can have a proper, perfect first time. And at the end of the day things happen, Ollie s was not a mistake, just helps me to grow. Ollie c is someone who I can be with who I can change myself for the better. I want this to be my ‘first time’ even if it isn’t. I hope I’m not a bad person for that. I know I’m lying, but can’t lying be excused every now and then.
I hope it can.

Goodnight, I x

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Dear you, I’m not sure whether you exist or what. And I’m not being rude but no one...